What is the comfort zone? I believe it’s something that we are willing to settle for. Something we’re used to. Security. Like a child with a blanket. And comfort zones are good. But sometimes if we stay stagnant for too long being comfortable can be detrimental to growth. Growing is a vital piece to personal freedom, peace within, and finding who you truly are. And according to Tony Robbins, growth and progress is an essential key to happiness.
In order to grow we must do things that makes us feel nervous, anxious, and terrified. The truth is, if we didn’t feel this way it wouldn’t be growth or change. In order to achieve this growth there has to be some uncomfortable feelings involved. It’s like the first day of school as a child. I don’t know about you, but I always had butterflies and anxieties about the first day of school! No matter which grade.
Although growth is vital to finding who are you it looks different for all people.
Growth is different for all
Let’s get into the different types of growth.
Growth is different for all of us because our security level is all different. What might be scary for me might not be scary for you. That’s okay! We each have to conquer our own fears to grow. So here are some examples to get your brain moving.
- Entry-level position to the CEO (with promotions of course.)
- Let’s say you want to make new friends, but you’re shy. Growth can be to make one new friend or acquaintance
- Not reacting to negativity that you used to react to
- Not calling your ex anymore- no matter how much it kills you
- Getting involved with a committee or volunteer group
- Going back to school-heck finishing school
- Going somewhere alone
- No social media for a few days- Yes! That’s growth!
- Changing your mindset
- Taking up a new hobby
- Going live on Socials (Personal story: I did this for the first time on 7.11.2017. I was so nervous. And I had a fear of doing it. But I did it! And seriously-it wasn’t that bad!)
The list goes on. So now that I’ve shared some examples let’s talk about feelings associated. Because that’s what really holds trips us up!
Oh yeah! Feelings! We just all love this word. Although we have every intention of changing or growing we sometimes get overwhelmed with feelings. Feelings that scare us into not wanting to step outside the comfort zone. Even if we make conscious efforts to make the step, we sometimes don’t realize there are feelings associated with stepping outside of the box that actually stop us from ever moving on. So I am going to list some of the feelings associated with stepping out the zone.
This is certainly not a comprehensive list. But these are certainly some of the feelings associated with growing and changing. Ever wonder why you just don’t want to do something or you wait until the very last minute to get something done? Because there is a fear- very subtle fear- that makes you feel like you may actually not be able to do what is being asked. Or not complete the task or the challenge at hand. Our brain are made for survival. So the natural thing for us to is remind us of uncomfortable feelings before it actually takes place. Meaning your feelings aren’t necessarily real. It’s up to you to train your brain to acknowledge the feeling and do it anyway. It’s the only way you’ll step out of the comfort zone and grow.
So in order to actually walk out of the comfort zone it will take certain steps to get there.
Make a conscious realization that you will be stepping out of the comfort zone and the feelings associated with doing this that might knock you off the path.
Take your first step outside of the box. You can do this by deciding what you want to change or learn. For example, you are going to learn a new skill. When the first day of class begins you show up for the class. You do this even though you might have anxiety or stress related feelings to this.
Continue with your actions. In order to actually move out of the comfort zone you have to continually step out of the zone. The idea is to help you grow. So in other words you attend all the classes to learn that new skill. So that you have take-aways to apply to your life or profession.
Now written down this might seem so simple.
The truth is, it may not be that simple to maintain the brain. This is why it’s super important to have a “why” behind your growth.
It is also super important to remember patience. Although it’s so bitter, at first, the taste afterwards is worth conquering every fear your brain made up.
Sometimes it’s not that easy to get to baby steps. Or not as easy to grow later on in our paths to freedom. Whys is that? Sometimes we have some emotional attachments to feelings that are ultimately setting us back from what we really want to achieve. This doesn’t have to be necessarily associated with professional goals or the alike. Remember growth can take place in all aspects of our lives. Like the example I mentioned earlier, let’s say you want to make new friends, but you’re shy. Growth can be to make one new friend or acquaintance within a certain amount of time. Well let’s say for whatever reason you just can’t bring yourself to talk to someone. You feel shy or that you might say something stupid, Or might even feel socially awkward etc. Well there might be deeper rooted issues that are preventing that move forward. So how do you move on? The best thing to do is to get down and dirty with that emotional trigger. This what I recommend:
Get a journal. (Want more than just a one liner on journaling? Check this link here.)
Write down any words that come to mind when you are trying to step out of your comfort zone. Just write about those words. Where else do those words lead you to? What things, events, people are coming to mind?
Anything? If so write about it. And continue the process until you can no longer write about it.
Now, this is not an overnight fix. However your brain is now aware of some of these events and or emotions that are associated with stepping out the comfort zone that you can take baby steps to address certain feelings (mostly forgive yourself for having these feelings) and move on out of the comfort zone. It does take some work but I know you can do it. And if you want more check out this awesome freebie workbook to help you get down and dirty with these emotions.
Tying it Together
Stepping out of the comfort zone can be a hard thing to do. Especially because we are naturally programmed to stay in our comfort zone. But the reality is change is the only constant in life. May as well embrace it. And there is no right or wrong direction out of the comfort zone because everyone has a different fears, past, and emotions. Some people have different levels of what safety might mean for them. But it is in our best interest to grow, change, and adapt. This is so that we are able to learn, to understand and think in a different perspective that we might not have before. The only way to do that is to believe in yourself! And sometimes that means defeating emotional triggers! But ultimately you are capable of growing! Of becoming better than the day before!
Now pick something that you’ve been putting off. That you’ve been dying to do but haven’t. Something that scares you. Even if it’s downloading the Emotional Trigger workbook and dealing with those emotions (download here.) Take daily action to make progress towards moving out of the comfort zone. And share your progress with me. Use #asfreeasyousee. You can do it! So take action now. I believe in you!